Got a call from Lhene yesterday evening that she and Donday were at David’s Bridal – looking at dresses. It didn’t hit me right away…and I went back to the house-chores I was trying to knock-out before they got home.
Later that evening (when they walked through the door), they both had this – for lack of a better phrase – shared-air of satisfaction. Then Lhene came over to the couch where I was sitting and started showing me the pics (on her phone) of Donday trying on wedding dresses.
BAM!
Yup! Right upside the head!
I got the bone-deep realization that this whole thing is real, actually gonna happen, and my little, baby-girl is gonna get married (perceptively) in a blink and will be moving out of my everyday life.
Although she looked absolutely, painfully, overwhelmingly gorgeous in every pic, in every dress, there was this background vibration in my brain reminding me “She’s leaving soon.”
I had to go through that same process with Josh soooo many years ago. My #1 Son – my little buddy (note: no matter how old he gets, how big he gets, how into-his-own-life-and-wife-and-kids-and-etc he gets, he’s still my little buddy). Now I’m going through it again with Donday.
There’s this paradox of “Time” where it passes in two distinct manners >> All too fast (she’ll be gone soon) and far too slowly (constant reminders in various ways that she’ll be leaving soon).
I was listening to a podcast this morning and this guy who has extremely strong views (and studies to prove them) that childless couples live happier and more-fulfilled lives than those couples who have kids. However, ironically (used correctly?), he has a daughter. So, he was asked (during a Q&A) why – if he believed this SO strongly – did he have a child. He said something to the affect of, “For two reasons: First, I felt that we would be different – that my wife and I had the ability to not fall into the confirmed pitfalls that all other parents have obviously fallen into. However, after she was born and we realized that this wasn’t true, we then realized that – despite (albeit) having a life that may be less fulfilled in some ways as those without kids, and yes, we sacrificed (and continue to sacrifice) so much of our selves and our potential in favor of putting our child first – these sacrifices and the resulting successes and joys are rewards that childless couples will never know.” (okay – he may not have said all of that, but that’s what I got out of his answer).
My kids are my success (as is my marriage). Every time I think of you two, see you, hear your voices, I am reminded of how successful I have been.
Thank you.
Dear Kids 